ischemic gut? show of hands!

so last monday i had a colonoscopy because of what happened at lakefront.

i want to take a moment to write a little commentary on the state of healthcare in the united states.  i went in for this procedure at 8am.  i sat in the waiting room for 30 minutes before someone took me back to a room where i was stripped of all the clothing and items that make me a person and put in a gown, robe, and booties that make me look just like every other sick person in the hospital.  just a number essentially.  then i was taken into a room that had a bed.  i was put in the bed, given an iv, given a wristband, asked a few questions, and then left there facing a window with my back to all the goings ons for an hour and 40 minutes.  at that point a woman came in, asked my name, and wheeled me to a different room and left me there.  i waited there another 30 minutes by myself before someone came in and told me what the hell was going on.  about 10 minutes after that the doctor, nurse, other doctor, and whomever else was part of the procedure came in.  i felt very invisible the whole time and it sucked.  it leaves a person feeling very vulnerable being all naked in a bed with some crappy little gown and thin blanket covering them.  it was lame and i hated it.  it is everything that is wrong with our healthcare system.  people are meaningful and important.  what is happening to them in a hospital is meaningful and important and while i understand that the healthcare workers are doing just that... working.  they could also treat the patients like human beings and not things on a conveyor belt.  </>rant

so i had to have this colonoscopy because i was experiencing a concerning amount of bleeding from my rectum after my marathon.  in hindsight (no pun intended) it is entirely because i was dehydrated and under fueled.  a doctor i work with informed me that it is likely i was suffering from ischemic gut.  this affliction is compounded by the fact that my migraine medication (topamax) has the unfortunate side effect of diarrhea which certainly doesn't help things.  runners trots has nothin' on me!  basically they found after my colonoscopy that i have a beautiful, pristine, problem free colon... my intestines are lovely... perfection really.  i was given the diagnosis of a whole lot of nothing at all wrong with me.  i was also told to try taking in some fiber.  um, ok.  thanks for nothing.

what i probably looked like 'cept i wasn't wearing
underpants or drooling or bald or homer.

nothing like having a camera shoved up one's arse and wiggled around for no good reason.  the funny part of the colonoscopy story is that they basically roofie you so you don't remember the procedure.  i remember the nurse pushing the medication into my iv.  i remember it hurting and burning and being incredibly uncomfortable.  i remember the tech telling me to turn onto my left side.  then i remember ABSOLUTELY NOTHING until i'm watching this HUGE TV OF MY COLON.

this is a reenactment of the one-sided conversation that ensued:

doctor 1 to doctor 2: "take a sample right there."
me: "no! do NOT take a sample right there! now look!  you made me bleed!"

i don't recall if anyone responded to me.

doctor 1 to doctor 2:  "take a sample there."
me: "no!  don't take another sample! you made me bleed again!"

then i remember nothing until they're asking me if it's ok to call my husband.  then i remember my husband being there and the nurse giving him some directions that i don't remember.  then i remember doctor 2 telling me that i was right and they found nothing.  that i'm perfectly healthy.

while i'm happy about that i'm also thinking that is super lame and stupid because it doesn't solve my problem.

so what is ischemic (is-KEY-mik) gut?  glad you asked... ischemic gut aka ischemic colitis is a sudden swelling of part or all of the intestine that occurs when there is a temporary lost of or reduction in blood flow.  there are innumerable things that can cause this including exercise (although it's supposedly uncommon).  strenuous physical activities, such as long distance running or cycling, have been reported to lead to colonic ischemia, presumably by physiologic shunting caused by mesenteric vasoconstriction and intravascular volume depletion from dehydration.  (SEE dehydration! that's totally my problem!)  basically, when you're running your blood flow is diverted from other parts of your body... um, like your legs (duh).  effectively cutting off flow to the intestines to get blood down to the legs... but then when the blood redistributes back to the intestines shit gets real (pun intended)...  and not in a good way.

in hindsight (which is always 20/20) the fact that i didn't consume all of the water in my water bottle as well as the fact that i stopped taking in supplemental nutrition at or around mile 7 is EXACTLY why my body freaked out.  i didn't even realize that i had almost a full water bottle until i finished!  it was cool out so i wasn't sweating much and didn't realize that i was barely drinking anything.  plus... i felt FINE until mile 13.  add to that i consumed way too much caffeine and it was a recipe for disaster.

i think i'll start the fiber regime soon.  i'll keep ya posted on how that's all working out.  since i'm not training right now i'm really only running around 25-30 miles a week and keeping it to 3 days a week.  2 short and 1 long run.  i'd like to run more but my work schedule is just not allowing it right now.  i just gave my notice at the temp job i've been working for the past 2 months and i start a new job on the 24th.  i'm super excited about it!  i will have stable work hours then and hopefully will get my running schedule back on track.  i get a one hour lunch and am wondering if i can pull off a runch a couple times a week but i'm not sure i'll be able to.  might not be good to be all sweaty and gross, but we'll see.  maybe i can pull it off once a week for 2-3 miles.

and that's all i have to say about that.