the "can't" conversation

today will be my 6th consecutive day without running.  i cannot tell you how truly challenging and awful that is.  letting my body heal is essential to future growth but that doesn't make the time off any easier to bear.  yesterday i tried bending my ankle (you know, in the natural way that one walks) and there was simply too much pain to actually go through with the movement.  *sigh*

i'm pretty sure i'm looking at AT THE VERY LEAST another week of minimal use.  i suppose its a good thing i have a desk job because then i'm forced to be off of my foot most of the day.  i did 15 min on and 45 min off icing all last saturday and sunday while being off my feet the majority of the day and i think that helped a lot. 

i have full range of motion with just a bit of discomfort while not  putting any weight on my foot but as soon as i try to bend it while standing or attempting walking... that's a whole different story altogether.

running is essential to my mood stabilization.  i have always struggled with my mental health and when i began running that CHANGED EVERYTHING!  it has made me a generally happier, nicer, kinder, more thoughtful, and more appreciative person.  i look at the world differently because of running.  i feel included in the world and i feel fortunate to live in and be a full and present participant in the life that has been afforded to me. 

don't get me wrong... i have "problems" but running has changed my perspective on those "problems" to where i don't really say i have "problems" but CHALLENGES.  i mean, problems can be solved but saying that word - problems - indicates something very negative but calling one's problems CHALLENGES implies strength, control, and something that can be overcome with great victory!  i also try not to say that i "can't" do something because that implies a lack of control as well.  i want to be in charge of my life.  i want to own my life.  i want the challenges in my life to be something i work towards changing and not something that overcomes me.  when a person says that they "can't" change something about their life... "can't" get faster, "can't" run hills, "can't" win a race... all of those are misnomers. 

anyone CAN do anything... a person just chooses not to take the steps to attain that goal. 

now that doesn't mean that you have complete control over all aspects of your life or the situation at hand.  your CHOICE comes in with how you CHOOSE to deal with the things which you have no control over.

a very good friend of mine had that "can't" conversation with me a few years back and (at the time) i simply couldn't wrap my head around it.  how is it possible to change one's "can't" to something that one CAN control?  there are a lot of things that are out of our control so i was unable to work out how it would be at all possible for me to STOP saying "can't".  it's not 100% possible but it is possible enough that now i can control most of the way i look at my life.

ok... off the "can't" soapbox now... have a great weekend and i'll do the same (while trying not to be bummed on my BUM ankle).

now, discuss...